Killer Cuts, Part Two

By DC Green
Part Two in a Series

Killer Cuts #3 - The Midnight Meat Train

With a name suitable only for horror or porn, The Midnight Meat Train is a disturbing mystery wrapped up in a gruesome riddle. Who exactly is Mahogany (snicker -- Vinnie Jones in what I swear IS NOT a porn movie) and what is his sinister purpose? This is exactly the question that art photographer Leon (Bradley Cooper) seeks the answer to after his chance encounter with Mahogany, an encounter that leads Leon toward a dark destiny from which there is no escape.

Based on the short story by Clive Barker, The Midnight Meat Train is a brave sort of horror film, smarter than you'd think at first glance and willing to take you to unexpected places. While the ending has been found to be a bit divisive among horror fans, it doesn't matter whether you willingly accept the ending of the film or not, you'll enjoy the very stylish, very bloody trip there.

There was a bit of controversy surrounding this movie's release (or lack thereof) and it's kind of criminal how Lionsgate treated this film. After internal management changes, LIonsgate began pushing the release date of the movie back indefinitely, using their dollars to promote lesser films such as The Strangers (which I didn't think was nearly as effective as everyone else) and Saw IV, so they decided to bench MMM for an undisclosed period of time. After horror fans began clamoring for it by way of online petitions and requesting it for festivals, Lionsgate finally relented, releasing it in a limited engagement in August 2008 --- to second run theaters. That's right, this baby didn't go straight-to-DVD...it went straight to the dollar theater.

I don’t know about you, but with a title like The Midnight Meat Train, and given its relatively low budget, you would think that the Lionsgate marketing department would push it to an October release, and have a field day with this one. "This Halloween, don't drive to the party, take the train." The sexual innuendo and publicity via bad taste alone would be pure gold..."Up For Some Naughty Halloween Fun? Ride The Midnight Meat Train." Those aren't great examples, but you get the point. Bottom line: Don't make the same mistake as Lionsgate, do yourself a favor and ride the train this Halloween.

Killer Cuts #4 - Cemetery Man (Dellamorte Dellamore)

Cemetery Man (Dellamorte Dellamore) is an Italian horror comedy (don't worry, it's in English) that, like most Italian horror, is part gonzo fright film, part existential meditation. The one thing that Cemetery Man has over most of its Giallo progenitors is an actual plot, though in the Italian horror tradition, the ending of this one will leave you scratching your head. However, the sex, blood, humor and hypnotic visuals will ensure you stay happy in the process of getting there.

Buffalora, Italy, is a town permeated by strange happenings; the town is often subject to intermittent earthquakes, and ever more strangely, the dead residents of the cemetery like nothing more than to crawl themselves up from the ground, hungry for living flesh. Francesco Dellamorte (Rupert Everett) is the caretaker at the local cemetery, and is a man tasked with the most peculiar of jobs -- keeping the dead in their graves...a job with which Francesco is becoming more and more disillusioned.

Francesco's problems are further compounded when he falls in love with a newly widowed beauty, sending his life into twisted new entanglements. Cemetery Man is weird, sexy and way out there, a description that should earn it a place in your Halloween horror catalog.